So I've been sick all weekend and spent much of it in a cold-med-induced coma. Nothing serious (the plague) and I'll live (there were moments I wished I didn't). Yes, I suffered. I watched movies...some good, some not so good. I watched a chick flick about weddings and it got the wheels turning in my brain about a subject that's been hovering in the corners of my consciousness: Biological imperative.
Let me explain. I'm single. I've never seen myself as being alone, but I am. I've carried the idea around that I would meet someone new...that I might actually meet the "right" person...and life would start anew, the life I am "supposed" to be living.
That's my emotional side.
But I'm also a biologist. I know a little about evolution, about the instincts and biological imperatives that have enabed our species survive. Humans hit a certain age and we have urges...biology prompts men to notice women who are young, healthy looking, with certain body characteristic (nice hips, breasts). Sure those women look "good" and "sexy", but why? Because women who look like that are in their fertile prime. Yes, women have similar traits they seek for in men...it's usually signals that indicate the ability to provide and protect.
And falling in love? Humans are primed for it in a certain age bracket (not just socially, but biochemically). You meet that person and woooo, you're ready to reproduce. Maybe it sounds cynical, but that's what falling in love is - the bond couples form that enables them to stay together build a family and raise their offspring - and there! We've successfully reproduced.
So as i'm keeping an eye out for "Mr. Right", I realize that the biological imperative isn't present in men & women my age. Women my age are still looking for a protector/provider but not for reproductive reasons. And what about the men? If they're still looking for the same thing- young, fertile - that counts me out.
What are the triggers for attraction for people my age? What is the biological imperative? I really LIKE that being in love feeling...is that just not a function of my age group? Not in the biochemical make-up of people in my age bracket...? Ugh.
Perhaps i should be looking for expecting something else?
3 comments:
I'm 27 and single. What I've said about you in the past has always been true. You are beautiful, you are intelligent, you have a nice sense of humour which I've noticed. Through your words, you are kind and you have a good soul. I'm not religious, nor a biologist and my understanding of true love feels different to other peoples. Using your words though, you are easily a woman I would provide for and protect no matter what. Any man worthy of you and your love, will see you.
You...your superpower is the ability to make a woman blush with pleasure from halfway across the world.
Thank you.
I answered someone's tweet with these same words, but it doesn't make them less sincere. "All I did was write the truth".
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